Sounds like a crazy plan right? Well it is! But it is what most of us go through trying to make a life in a foreign country. This seems to happen to me after a prolonged period of what seemingly could be labeled as non-productivity. I get a burst of momentum that makes me feel nearly unstoppable but to get going forwards means to step backwards. What do I mean by that? Let me try to explain it.
Every time I take a trip home (USA) I often get very nostalgic, of course. Inevitably, this makes me take inventory of the things I want in my life. I have a lot now but one thing that is missing is a career or simply work that is satisfactory. I want to be a service to others outside of my family and yeah, I want to get paid for it.
I was raised in a house that evolved with the times. My mother stayed home with us up until there were 4 of us. She decided to go back to school and finish her degree then move on to get a Masters degree. The whole time she was achieving this I was in high school. You can imagine that this set a very powerful example for me. By her achievement, I learned: No matter where you are in your life you can change your circumstances. She went back to school in a city 2 hours south of our hometown while holding down a part time job. She did this for several nights a week until she finished her degree. I remember she needed my help in getting signed up for graduation as she was healing from a surgery. I went to the office of Library Science to enroll her. Everyone knew her and were thrilled to meet her daughter. It was so wonderful to meet strangers who saw my mother in a different way than I had. It made me proud to be her daughter.
Like her, I love being home with my child. I am very thankful that we are able to sustain a quality life while allowing me the time to nurture our child’s development. I never thought I would have the opportunity. But I also want to give my daughter the example of having both a career and being a good mother/domestic goddess (homemaker is such a loaded word for me so I’m opting to use Roseanne Barr‘s interpretation). I also want to be more apart of this community. But in order to get there I have to get back into the workforce. My options as an expatriate are limited since quite often the most positions of value call for specialized degrees AND experience in that field. I know this because I’ve been through the gambit a few years back. In order to get moving forward I will have to go backwards and get a lower level job to a) either work my way up or b) get more education, as my mother did. I’ve been living here for almost 5 years and it can be frustrating to realize I am still working this out. I am often worried about making the wrong choice in which direction I want to go. Education is an investment of your time and money. I want to be sure that I do something valuable for myself, my family and the community.
- Three Steps Backwards… (nananonsense.wordpress.com)